Wednesday, February 21, 2007

The New Class War

A London Fog exclusive!

Manifesto
of the Global Warming Party

2007

A spectre is haunting the planet -- the spectre of climate change. All the capitalist powers have entered into a holy alliance to exorcise this spectre: George Bush and Stephen Harper, Walmart and Ford, carnivores and Holocaust deniers.

Where is the party in opposition that has not been decried as unrealistic by its opponents in power? Where is the opposition that has not hurled back the branding reproach of tyranny, against the more advanced opposition parties, as well as against its reactionary adversaries?

Two things result from this fact:

I. Climate change is already acknowledge by the UN to be itself a reality.

II. It is high time that global warming activists should openly, in the face of the whole world, publish their views, their aims, their tendencies, and meet this nursery tale of the spectre of global warming with a manifesto of the party activists.

To this end, the International Panel on Climate Change have assembled in France to deliver their manifesto.

[A NATION OF CARBON EMITTERS]

The history of all hitherto existing society is the history of class struggles.

Our epoch, the epoch of SUV drivers, possesses, however, this distinct feature: it has simplified class antagonisms. Society as a whole is increasing measured by their ecological footprint.

The scientific findings of Marx and Engels prove that human beings are responsible for global warming:
All the preceding classes that got the upper hand sought to fortify
their already acquired status by subjecting society at large to their
conditions of appropriation. The proletarians cannot become masters of
the productive forces of society, except by abolishing their own
previous mode of appropriation, and thereby also every other previous
mode of appropriation. They have nothing of their own to secure and to
fortify; their mission is to destroy all previous securities for, and
insurances of, individual property.
Stay tuned for the next installment: "To produce is to destroy."

1 Comment:

Temujin said...

My PT Cruiser is of the Utmost in Filth.

I shall repent, say a thousand "Hail Gore's", and do whatever else necessary to offset the vile footprint I have left.

Please instruct further!