Monday, November 13, 2006

Dianne Haskett extreme makeover

Dianne Haskett to unleash new image:

"She's not hiding, she's preparing to blow your socks off when she appears with her new 'urban' look!" says an unidentified source close to the campaign.
Sources are also saying the former mayor moved to the Chocolate City to learn how to succeed as a retro-moralist leader in a decaying urban environment - and where better to start than Washington D.C.?
"I think she has learned a lot down there. While others bemoan the crumbling of urban America and spread fear and panic that Canadian cities face the same fate as those in America, I think she understands that faith is strengthened by adversity."
The Rev. Randolph Dribblet, who has been studying the Christian youth vote for some time now, says that Haskett has to reconnect with the youth of today.
"The uptight Christian image just ain't gonna wash so good with today's young Londoners, y'know what it is I'm saying, dig?
"Them young voters these days, they got them iPods, listening and wriggling to that damn jungle music - they're on the Internet downloading the kinda porn we couldn't even have imagined was out there back when we were young . . . they want someone to connect with, dig?

"Now I'm not saying she'll be pole dancing at the debates; we're counting on having enough name recognition at this point that we don't have to resort to that kind of gimmick."
Has our former mayor really learned how to loosen up or is this really just another political makeover?
Telling our source close to the campaign that she has always admired the way big city girls party, Haskett seemed pleased with her looser image, saying "I think this is going to be the little controversy for next month."

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Sky Captain said...
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