Friday, June 23, 2006

London Ontario UnDeciphered

Uncyclopedia puts London on the map:

London, Ontario is a city created in an early attempt of city cloning. The plan had been to Build exact duplicate of London in the middle of southwestern Ontario, why they decided to do this is beyond me... But the plan was later abandoned when English and Canadian guys were all pissed off when they found out that the government was doing this, supposedly the ethical issues it raised were overwhelming or something...

So when the project was canceled only 'bout 5% of what london should've become was there and oddly enough the cloning plan had called for the creation of all shopping facilities first. Leaving London, Ontario with an incomprehensibly large excess of malls which still plague the city to this day.

London's bus transportation system is world renowned for it's efficiency, routes and exquisite stop locations, which is very complementary alongside the revolutionary stop light network.

London has a big fat ball of tin foil that stinks like rotten garbage due to the Thames River. Another popular tourist trap is Victoria Park, which has plenty of rabid squirrels. They run around eating garbage and from time to time bite little Children's toes off. Watch Out!!!


Mitch said...

Ahhh.. "a large excess of malls". Would I be correct to presume that the wise people of London city council were behind such brilliant city revitalization plans as the London Mews in the 70's and the Galleria in the late 80's-early 90s... Two largely empty, and especially in the case of the mews - decrepit eyesores.

Katrina said...

I seriously agree with the squirrel issue..what can be done?? linkin your blog btw.