Friday, November 11, 2005

Daddy's a drunk, Mommy's on Prozac, Billy's chewing Ritilan, Susie's smoking crack and the Cat's on pot.

I have been coping the last 20 years with that guilt famliy and friends often feel when someone close is suffering from drug abuse. I can remember those mornings waking up and my kitty sitting strangely placid and (unlike most humans after such indulgence and completely unlike his sober self) not hungry - just a silly looking expression on his face as he'd sit, comfortably numb, just outside the bedroom door. DAMN! Without even looking I knew the lil' bastard had slipped into the grow room again.

Yes, my companion of 13 years was a marijuana user. Finicky too. I'd leave piles of the dried shit lying around, but for him it had to be fresh. The first few times it was just the little plants: cropped right at the crotch. Amazingly though, they'd grow back with two branches instead of just one (they're weeds after all), and I realized the lil' bastard was teaching me how to prune. Gotta give credit where credit's due so, despite myself, I started to let him into the grow room now and again and he would clear away all those pale leaves at the base of the plants. I often wonder if, as an indoor cat, he was just looking for some nip and had to settle on eating Mary Jane as she was the only thing available - sorta like drinking mouth wash, ya know?

I once rolled a "joint" of catnip for him to play with and, instead of sniffing and batting it around, he took it in his paw and swallowed the whole thing in one gulp - seriously hard core. Needless to say, I had to keep him away from that stuff and in his need he turned to pot.
Well, I'm not alone:

Vets in Britain are increasingly treating household pets for the side-effects of drug abuse, a survey has revealed.

Half of the vets surveyed said they had treated domestic pets who appear to be suffering adverse effects of eating mood-enhancing drugs such as cannabis.

Keep smoking Lil' Buddy! Sorry I couldn't keep you straight,(*sniff*) but hell, you never exhibited any adverse effects . . . you seemed so content . . .


Anonymous said...

I cannot believe an otherwise intelligent blog allows this moral degenerate basil to post his drug-crazed dribble. Have you no decency?

Anonymous said...

Have you ever heard the song "Susie's on Prozac" by an LA based band called Thrills with Johnny Angel?