Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Anne Marie DeCicco goes to outer space

"I'm over the moon right now," a jubilant Mayor Anne Marie DeCicco said.
Say, what's got Anne Marie dropping her customary "valley girl" speech fillers and draping her cleavage all over Paul Martin's jolly uncle knees? Anne Marie is over the moon, alright! Right over into the Strapless-Red-Dress airhead-equality dimension.

With three levels of government savagely competing for the destruction of jurisdictional sovereignty all in order to serve Londoners, it shouldn't be all that surprising that the connections between the different parts of Londoners' political brains have been completely severed. According to the London Free Press,
London will rake in almost twice what it expected from federal gas-tax revenue, just-released projections show. Yesterday's windfall is the latest in a series of unexpected provincial and federal jackpots the city has hit in the last two months.
We've just won the lottery! Given the special London-disability federal tax exemption, this of course means that only other parts of the country will be giving their tax revenue to London, and Londoners don't have to pay gax-tax for any other non-disabled municipalities! Nyah nyah!
The city will take in almost $55 million over the next five years from Ottawa's decision to share a cut of its gas tax with municipalities.

[…] "I'm over the moon right now," a jubilant Mayor Anne Marie DeCicco
said. "$54.6 million over five years. Can it get any better than that?"
$1 billion dollars right now? That would be much better — council could speed up the plan to give every Londoner their own motorized scooter and helmet. But don't go around emoting that these federal jackpots fall from completely non-temporal skies — you wouldn't see Jehovah dishing out manna to any Tom, Dick or Harry who wan't willing to do a little proselytizing for Him, now, would you? Put the London Free Press and Anne Marie DeCicco together, and I see it's time for an unpaid unregistered political plug for the Liberal Party:
That money is part of the deal the New Democrats made with the Liberals to support the federal budget. It depends on the budget passing next week, prompting Prime Minister Paul Martin yesterday to urge the opposition Conservatives to pass it.

"There's too much at stake for us to tolerate partisan games any longer," Martin said. "I believe that it is time to put politics aside and pass the budget."
Of course! Money matters are always non-partisan, aren't they? The fact that they're traditionally considered to be confidence motions is superfluous to this parliament — one-party states must by redefinition be non-partisan to maintain the paternalistic fiction. I feel for Paul, really I do — you don't have to see Kim Il-Jung or Fidel Castro getting on their knees for this kind of democratic citizen-loving.

OK, enough of Paul Martin — mutual masturbation has to go both ways. Anne Marie's still has some more heavy breathing to do.
"There's going to be no shortage of ways that we can use this money to improve the infrastructure of our city and make us even more competitive than we are today," DeCicco said. "We'll be able to bank any of the money that we don't use in the first year … [and] can use it for projects next year," she said.
Projects! Anne Marie sure knows what we Londoners need… more bread and circuses. Time to start putting London on the creative cities map…

PAC poster by Mike

We at the London Fog must caution the citizenry of the need for vigilance against the dark forces on council who're trying to pass off paltry slices of enriched white bread without the self-aggrandizing circus visions of Mayor DeCicco. Listen to this frightening Palpatine-wannabe:
Any extra money should be divided between debt, tax relief and improving social programs, said Coun. David Winninger. "I don't think giving people money back would be prudent. It seems foolish, like a gimmick, if we give with one hand, but we know we're going to need that money in the future, so we're going to take it back," he said.
At least he's not suggesting that Londoners should have any of that money in their own pockets — who knows what grubby uncivic things people would buy with it.