Saturday, April 23, 2005

Bonehead Logic


Even Bono's pissed off at Martin, but not for the right reasons of course.
If being mired in scandal and threatened with imminent defeat weren't enough, Prime Minister Paul Martin capped off a brutal week by striking a sour note with his most famous fan. Rock superstar Bono is irked by Martin's refusal to meet a long-stated standard for foreign aid increases.

"I'm annoyed," the U2 frontman says in an exclusive interview to be aired Saturday on CBC Radio's The House.

"I'm bewildered, really. I'm disappointed.

"I can't believe that Paul Martin would want to hold up history."
Onward with the communist revolution. The dirty evil capitalists will fall as predicted. Never mind that capitalism is the system that enables rock stars to accumlate vast sums of money. But Bono is progessive and has his mind on higher aspirations.
Martin recently said he won't commit to spending 0.7 per cent of gross domestic product on foreign aid by the year 2015 because he's not convinced the country can afford it.

But Bono, showing a keen knowledge of Canada's domestic prosperity, would not let the prime minister's contention go unchallenged.

Ottawa has racked up successive multi-billion-dollar surpluses, and countries such as Britain, France and Germany commit to the 0.7 benchmark.

"There is a blessing on this country, on Canada," Bono said.

He also said Martin's political problems were no excuse for failing to increase foreign aid.

"It's a time for real leadership. I understand there's problems at home. I understand it's hard to get time to focus on this."
Hat tip: Andrew Coyne

Update: Raskolnikov is the master. I cannot help myself and here reproduce his entire post:
As the lead singer of a popular musical group, Bono’s power in the highest levels of world diplomacy, and his influence as an erudite master of economics, foreign policy, world history and government, makes him the kind of god-like figure you want on your side.

With his ability to shame the sissy, craven leaders of the world’s irrelevant countries into ejaculations of guilt over the fact that their countries have the audacity to follow a market system, Bono has become the leading political juggernaut of the new millenium.

This is good news for those of us who want to see Paul Martin out of office.

Bono’s strangehold on Martin’s emtional psyche needs to be exploited.

I say we make a deal.

We can allow U2 to travel across our country, charging $135 for an opportunity to see balding men dressed in tight leather perform. With the money earned they can then add to the hundreds of millions of dollars they already have. We won’t even tax them heavily or anything.

All we ask in return is that Bono take Mr Martin for a walk in the woods, say a few dewy words of forgiveness, and let him go.

You’re free boy. You’re free.

What our country needs right now is a firm but compassionate hand to guide us into the future. Only Bono has that power.

Please Mr Vox, please help our third world country get rid of an enormous debt.

4 comments:

lance said...

>> Ha! I am just making a post about Bono right now! Coming soon. What a crazy coincidence!

Hehe and I read it. Bono adding to the fuel that's burning under PM^2, luv that.

At least he didn't try to sell his soul to get his policy, unlike a certain NDP leader.

Cheers,
lance

darcey said...

I can't belive that Martin would not want not be a part of history ...hmmm...He needs to take off his specs. Martin will write oh yeah

Sixlegged said...

I always get Bono confused with that dude from INXS they found strangulated and masturbated with a bunch of drugs in his room. I know they are/were two fdifferent people, but for some reason I can't separate them in my head!

Temujin said...

If Bono's comments are what passes for "a keen knowledge of Canada's domestic prosperity" then Heaven help us when the next rock star comes along who has a superior knowledge.